Today, I realize that although I am learning a lot and picking up new skills and doing new things, I wish I could be someone else. Not someone else in general, but particular. It's a girl who goes to my school. She has lots of friends, is super pretty, has great hair, is constantly doing new things, doing volunteer work, and most notably--is the girlfriend of a boy I really wanted for my own. So I wished I could be her.
And then I got to thinking. Why can't I just be happy with being myself? I can see all the wonderful things about other people, but when it comes to seeing those unique qualities in myself, I am completely blind. Why do I always make awesome plans about all the awesome things I'm going to do so that one day I will be awesome, and then never act on those plans from day to day? I spend so much time wishing I was someone else, or wishing I was the me in the future instead of taking action to make myself that person.
I will never become that person if I don't act daily. For example, I have an enormous list of books I want to read, but I instead of spending my evenings pouring over the pages of classic literature, I turn on the TV and tune into its alluring glare and superficial reality shows.
That ends now.
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